Tennis

Jim
y'all heading to the bbq soon?>
Larry
ya
Larry
you going?
Jim
neg
Mike
giant fag
Jim
hey, I'm not the one with a tennis racket up my ass.
Mike
sure youre not
Jim
is my webcam on?
Mike
hahah
Sam
a tennis racket is not a cock
Jim
new meaning to "working from home"
Sam
that doesn't make him a fag
Jim
just sporty.
Sam
working it home
Mike
hahaha
Jim
that's almost bloggable

Condolences

Sam
when i die you guys have to write some funny shit on my card
Jim
"What's this about leap frogging?"
Jim
haha. ok
Larry
"I can't believe he died with that much KY up his HOOHA"
Larry
"Midgets are jealous lovers, who knew?"
Jim
haha. and here I thought I'd gone too far.
Larry
"Fucking tigers, can't train them, can't properly operate a strap-on, AMIRITE?!"
Sam
you can never go too far when Larry is around
Larry
until the dildo hits pubic bone
Larry
then you gotta stop

Club

Mike
poor poor Mary Jo
Larry
who is she and why is she poor?
Mike
you'll find out eventually
Sam
why does it have to be the 25/35 year club
Jim
is that similar to the mile-high club?
Sam
i'd feel cheated if a 25 yearer could join my club
Mike
haha
Jim
35 years of getting fucked by Corp.?
Mike
hahahahah
Sam
fucking the Corp. dog, you mean
Mike
heey..we're doing a pretty good job of the pitchin right now
Larry
the Corp. dog is a slut, though, in her defense
Sam
she?
Mike
hahha
Mike
in my mind, the dog is a guy
Larry
whatever helps you keep it up
Sam
hahahaha
Jim
hahaha
Larry
i ain't gonna judge you, you sick fuck.
Mike
rough day
Mike
cant stop laughing
Sam
that is almost blog worthy
Mike
dooo eeett

Hydraulic Lifts

Construction guys working a hydraulic lift of some sort outside the office.

Larry
they be fucking WORKING those hydraulic lifts for REALS
Mike
haha....they're probably just giggling away...UP,UP,UP...DOWN,DOWN,DOWN
Larry
HEE HEE!
Larry
ookoko,
Larry
now go down
Larry
OMFG THAT"S SO COOL
Larry
okookokk.. try up
Larry
IT"S LIKE I"M FLYYYING!
Mike
STOP STOP STOP!!
Mike
ok sorry...i got scared
Larry
hahahahaha

Suspicious Guy

Mike says:
oh sure
Mike says:
suspicious caucasion
Mike says:
is that like an auspicious occasion?
Mike says:
I noticed that he toched himself every 37 seconds
Mike says:
touched
Mike says:
torched
Mike says:
w/e
Sam says:
and i heard him jerking off in the washroom
Mike says:
She sounds really fuckin busy up there
Sam says:
He looked like a student in 3rd or 4th year. 
Sam says:
what do they look like
Mike says:
caucasian-y
Sam says:
he rejected her hit on him and now she wants pay back
Sam says:
an uncomfortable smile
Sam says:
some odd woman starts chatting to him, i don't blame him
Mike says:
sat on a chair near counselling services....
Mike says:
um...
Mike says:
maybe he's fucking nuts?
Sam says:
when he hangs himself she is going feel really shitty
Mike says:
haha
Mike says:
Please be aware of any suspicious individuals lurking around your work areas. And keep valuables locked up.

Welcome Back

Mike
lets catch Jim up to speed
Mike
You guys were gonna pair me up with your Moms
Sam
and then card asked you for buttsecks
Jim
sweet.
Jim
can get some of that action?
Jim
the moms, not the buttsecks
Mike
im torn
Mike
(tm)
Larry
after card, you certainly are
Jim
haha
Mike
oh? Does he have a large cock, Larry?
Sam
no, you have a little hole
Jim
er, had
Larry
naw, you just pucker when your scared and excited
Sam
you told us earlier, when you asked Jim to get out of it
Mike
ask me what a cockway is
Larry
and he was like
Larry
'almost done! but it's like a COCKRING in here'
Larry
cannon's blocked, as it were
Mike
see? This is what has been missing
Larry
penis unable to deliver semen payload, is another way to say it
Sam
i don't think this has been missing
Larry
he can't cum up your shitpipe, is another
Mike
oh yeah?
Larry
even i'm laughing at that
Mike
see above
Larry
my fingers, they type funny things
Sam
ok, ok
Larry
WHY ISN"T THIS BEING BLOGGEd!?
Mike
cuz youre too busy with your online reading material
Larry
there is alot
Sam
some one should be populating it

Fuck the French

Jim says:
was just going to add that both Sam and I tried XXX2 server earlier when we were getting the 1822 error, and it failed too.
Jim says:
so something has changed between then and now.
Mike says:
the URL 'fix'
Jim says:
but if that's what broke it in the first place....
Jim says:
I don't think we'll ever know.
Mike says:
yeah
Mike says:
I'd be happy with wtf 1822 means
Jim says:
you'd think somebody knows.
Jim says:
maybe I'll send them the french version of their error:
Mike says:
it's like dealing with us
Mike says:
hahaha
Jim says:
Désolé, nous ne pouvons pas traiter votre demande. Veuillez retourner au site du marchand.

Jim says:
hahahha
Jim says:
[Erreur #1822]
Mike says:
with a "Hey voulez-vous regardez, mutherfuckers" attached
Jim says:
hahaha
Mike says:
thye'll be all like "OH! Mon deur!! Erruer 1822. oui oui!"
Jim says:
"I told zem we already got one"
Mike says:
HAHA
Mike says:
i just loled
Jim says:
haha
Jim says:
me too
Mike says:
Larry says:
what the fuck are you laughing about over there, Gigglesworth?
Jim says:
haha

Donkey Riding

Sam says:
"In Spain we have a saying, you cannot ride the donkey and suck his cock all at the same time" - No Heroics
Mike says:
hahaha
Jim says:
hahah
Sam says:
"You know what I'm saying"
Jim says:
I finally watched the first one.
Jim says:
it was ok
Jim says:
but not great
Sam says:
yeah
Jim says:
do they get better?
Sam says:
not really
Sam says:
they have the odd really funny moment
Sam says:
they are worth watching....at work
Larry says:
you know what's surpsingly funny? Two and 1/2 Men
Sam says:
really?
Larry says:
some of their dialogue sounds like it was pulled from prodblog
Larry says:
yeah, i was shocked
Larry says:
it looks all wholesome
Mike says:
http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/ele/891765188.html
Mike says:
Im thinking $350 which includes the mount
Jim says:
what do you want a new monitor for?
Mike says:
the kitchen
Jim says:
as a tv?
Mike says:
yeah
Jim says:
ah
Larry says:
he wants anything that includes the word 'mount'
Mike says:
like as in mount your mother?
Jim says:
but remember, you can't mount his mother and suck her cock at the same time.
Jim says:
see what I did there?
Sam says:
nice work
Mike says:
i see what you did thee
Mike says:
re
Larry says:
the saddest day for Child Mike was when his parents took him to see the mounties
Larry says:
totally not what he expected
Mike says:
you made fun of Larry's mom's cock
Sam says:
i see that being used quite a lot
Sam says:
Larry's mom's cock...i mean
Jim says:
hahah
Larry says:
to be fair, it's got some GIRTH on it
Larry says:
if you can't open up the chocolate starfish enough to take in that python of spunk, that's YOUR problem
Mike says:
um...the chocolate starfish is on your underwear
Mike says:
get it right
Larry says:
mine might be
Jim says:
I thought the rusty sherrif's badge was on your underwear.
Larry says:
yorus is wrapped around my mom's ginormous cock
Mike says:
it is
Mike says:
right beside the chocolate starfish
Mike says:
here...
Mike says:
lemme shoew you

The Gift of Faith

Larry
hey fucknuts
Larry
what are you getting rambozo?
Mike
beats me
Mike
ask Mrs. Mike
Larry
so, it's not a coupon for Free Hugs then?
Mike
maybe some body condoms
Sam
what?
Mike
coupons will work
Sam
you really do practice safe sex
Sam
but you are catholic, wtf
Mike
i am
Mike
NOT
Sam
you are
Mike
shutupshutupashutoip
Sam
don't deny your faith
Sam
peace be with you
Mike
and aslo with yo---HEY
Sam
i'm not catholic, mother fucker
Larry
fuck, that Sam is a sly one

Sam pwns Jim

Sam says:
awesome boat http://withleather.uproxx.com/?p=10222
Jim says:
I dunno..
Jim says:
the sub can only go to 160 feet
Jim says:
pretty pathetic
Sam says:
how deep can your sub go, motherfucker
Jim says:
as deep as my imagination wants.
Sam says:
so like 20 feet
Mike says:
hahahaha
Jim says:
roughly
Mike says:
lemme check...yup! Thats a burn

Replacements

Larry

you guys do good work

Larry

i'm glad to be part of this team, to look like i'm doing something

Jim

yeah, this team easily accomplishes as much as one really hard working person could.

Larry

working part time

Jim

we really should slow it down a bit.

Sam

and not that hard

Larry

and not so much as person

Larry

as a highly talented monkey

Larry

with asperger's syndrome.

Sam

highly?

Jim

and not really highly.

Larry

moderately.

Jim

or talented

Larry

slightly above average.

Jim

or a monkey. 

Jim

more like a mongoose

Larry

large, sentient sea sponge then.

Jim

perfect.

Sam

a very dim mongoose

Sam

lazy

Larry

with rabies.

Larry

also, dead.

4 Degrees of Retardation

Larry says:
WTF are you guys talkiing about
Mike says:
yes. It is cool
Jim says:
nothing jerry, nothing.
Mike says:
backabed Jerry
Larry says:
this degrees does NOTHING
Mike says:
its weird....you'd think a biology degree would be more effective in our environment
Mike says:
what with Jim's desk
Larry says:
i know not to get to close.
Larry says:
no, imean my REAL degree fuckface
Sam says:
fucking common sense tells you that
Larry says:
'Writin' n Shit'
Larry says:
nonon
Larry says:
MY DEGREE tells me that
Sam says:
mine tells me you are close to exceeding your bandwidth
Larry says:
huh?
Jim says:
would you guys stfu or I'll come over there and Kick Some Ass
Mike says:
im using mine to the fullest right now
Sam says:
you can't be bothered
Jim says:
hmm. got me there.
Mike says:
two degrees?
Mike says:
Did you pick up a Bachelor of Boredom too?
Mike says:
Major in ennui
Jim says:
no, I have a major in Not Caring.
Larry says:
I MINORED IN THAT!
Jim says:
does anybody have a degree hanging in their office?
Jim says:
that we could replace
Jim says:
without them knowing 
Sam says:
we know Gerrard doesn't
Larry says:
hahahahhHAHAH
Mike says:
well...you could do that shit to Neo, but the fun would be lost when he retires and takes it home
Mike says:
never noticing
Jim says:
we could replace Neo's with a picture of a pig and he'd never notice
Mike says:
hahah...we should just hang some porn in there
Mike says:
People would sit down....look behind him at the wall
Mike says:
and wonder if they should say something
Mike says:
like:
Mike says:
"Is that a horse?"
Mike says:
fucking gold
Sam says:
Larry should be writing this shit
Larry says:
fuck
Mike says:
like that ad for the Christian Net Nanny
Larry says:
i got a degree to give you motherfucker.
Mike says:
and the comments afterwards
Mike says:
"Whatya lookin at Dad?"
Mike says:
"Just some horses"
Jim says:
hahah
Larry says:
'why is that poor lady grimacing?'
Mike says:
"That'sa smile, Son"
Larry says:
"Is she pooing out that horses ding dong?"
Mike says:
all
Mike says:
subtley
Mike says:
lost
Mike says:
how do you spell subtley
Mike says:
?
Sam says:
Larry probably knows how to spell it
Jim says:
goog question.
Larry says:
CUNT
Mike says:
fancy slang
Mike says:
fine Ill google it
Jim says:
that's not how you spell it.
Jim says:
and cunt ain't that fancy
Mike says:
that depends who you hang out with

Well....maybe you can.

Sam says:
Jim is not typing
Sam says:
i think he wants to see us jerk off
Jim says:
I've been hoping for that for the past 6 years...
Jim says:
why else would I spend time here
Jim says:
let me help you out.

Jim has left the conversation.

Mike says:
i thought for sure we were gonna get jacked off

You can't beat me......off.

Sam says:
Jim left
Sam says:
Jim thinks we're mean
Mike says:
he's still there
Sam says:
mine says he left
Mike says:
mine says he's still there
Sam says:
he's not typing anything
Mike says:
we can probably argue this for a while
Sam says:
how can we settle it
Mike says:
hand jobs
Sam says:
[PROD] Jim has left the conversation.
Sam says:
i don't see, oh ok
Mike says:
whoever wins first
Sam says:
but do we really need to jerk off each other
Mike says:
yes
Sam says:
if only Jim was type something
Mike says:
i think thats the point
Mike says:
the selling point
Sam says:
was would
Mike says:
was would?
Mike says:
wtf?
Sam says:
see my previous sentence
Sam says:
i really think we should include the other guys
Mike says:
if only Jim was would type something?
Sam says:
he's not here
Mike says:
are you trying to distract me while you beat me off?

BUMP in the road

Mike says:
Larry...need an acronym for BUMP
Larry says:
in relation to what?
Mike says:
the bumpy release this week
Mike says:
the BUMP in the release
Larry says:
k
Mike says:
you know the 40 foot gaping fucking pothol;e
Sam says:
our releases are always smooooth
Larry says:
Business User-centric Mandated Procedures
Mike says:
smooth like Cardinal in a club with the ladies
Mike says:
good Larry..now relate it to our release
Sam says:
it needs to mean fuck up
Larry says:
Bi-annual Unmediated Multi-user Problem
Mike says:
way to dumb it down Sam
Sam says:
on major fucking proportions
Larry says:
i thought brits weren't allowed to swear like that
Sam says:
been hanging around with Cheech too much
Sam says:
erm
Larry says:
heh
Larry says:
FUCK YOU BITCH
Mike says:
hhshsh
Sam says:
he is deep in thought now
Mike says:
thought...is that what they're calling it these days?
Larry says:
SHUT UP STUPID HEAD
Sam says:
Larry has a stupid head and a smart head
Larry says:
Baseless Unintended Multi-user Peer-challenge
Mike says:
ghey
Larry says:
ha! fooled you
Larry says:
Business User Multifractional Problem
Mike says:
Bitches Unintentionally Mangled Production
Larry says:
oh, something less formal
Sam says:
problem is not strong enough
Larry says:
but youc an't really use 'unintentionally', can you?
Mike says:
unknowingly
Mike says:
Btang Uisa Mfuck Pup
Larry says:
clever

Envy: a deadly sin woefully lacking

Larry
so you apparently want to go to some conference in Boston?
Larry
going to SF with Larry not good enough for you, is it?
Larry
the REDUNDANCE of Larry AND SAN FRAN would be TOO MUCH would it!?
Sam
hahaha
Sam
i've been to san fran before
Sam
the Larry part is hard to turn down though
Larry
you have friends in Boston?
Larry
knowing your complete inability to feel seething, debilitatting envy, I imagine they are full tenured Harvard professors, no? With a side job as a porn star specializing in guy on girl on girl on girl action?
Sam
You don't have a side job doing that?
Larry
no
Larry
my side job involves horses
Sam
ohh, oh
Larry
not the good end either

Face Mullet

Larry says (9:46 AM):
oh
Sam says (9:47 AM):
it's ok, you got the sex correct
Larry says (9:48 AM):
i'll get YOUR SEX CORRECT SWEETHEART
Larry says (9:48 AM):
i dunno where that came from
Larry says (9:48 AM):
four days away from my Sam
Larry says (9:48 AM):
it's, scarring
Sam says (9:49 AM):
i was just about to say, 9:48 first gay sex ref, but i just remembered Mike beat you
Mike says (9:50 AM):
off
Larry says (9:50 AM):
gently, though
Larry says (9:50 AM):
it's the first day of the week
Larry says (9:50 AM):
no callus inducing rubbing yet
Larry says (9:50 AM):
oh, there it is
Sam says (9:50 AM):
oh come on, like you weren't whacking off Monday at home
Mike says (9:51 AM):
who's Monday?
Larry says (9:51 AM):
it's not the same if it's not Mike, with his Southern Stache
Larry says (9:51 AM):
His Appalachian Sister Raper Face Mullet
Mike says (9:51 AM):
face Mullet
Larry says (9:51 AM):
i knew if i threw enough shit against the wall, some of it would stick

Midichlorians Invade MSN

Larry
so.. beautiful...
Larry
Love letter
Mike
haha
Larry
*sniff*
Mike
Does he also want to slit her open first
Mike
like the tauntaun
Larry
it's hardly a slit
Larry
a lightsabre makes a self-cauterizing CLEAN CUT
Larry
there could be no safer or more sanitary way to do it!!!
Larry
fucking n00b.
Larry
you are such a n00b, liike how jar jar tried to help his fellow Gungans protect beloved planet of Naboo, but failed miserably, only helping out by accident through some slap-sticky sort of clumsiness
Mike
you are hurting my feelings
Larry
you're a n00b like Anakin was when he tried to jump over Obi Wan from his hovering robot miner to the piece of jagged rock Obi Wan was perched on, only to be cut in fucking HALF.
Larry
you're a n00b like Greedo was a n00b to not just shoot Han before he sizzled his ass in the Cantina at Tatooine
Sam
OMG jay is so hawt
Larry
you're a n00b like Han was when he was trying to fix the lightspeed drive and R2 knew what was the problem right away
Larry
god, so many ways you're a n00b
Larry
it's EMBARASSING
Larry
man, didn't even have to TOUCH g00gle
Larry
i rawk
Mike
You're a n00b like when Rick Astley was gonna give you up but then never did
Larry
man, think of a comeback? or are you as inarticulate as the near-feral savage Sand People of Tatooine?!
Larry
don't you make fun of Rick
Larry
he'd NEVER let you down
Larry
unfortunatley for you all, I can go like this all day
Mike
oh dear
Sam
rick is a fall back all n00bs use
Larry
it sure is
Larry
see, matt's got my back like Han had Luke's back when he was trying to hit the ventilation duct of the Death Star that was no bigger than a womp rat, WITHOUT the use of his targetting computer.
Mike
okokokok...look...I need you to do this ALL THE TIME
Mike
it would rock
Mike
and not only on MSN
Mike
in meetings
Sam
in meetings, YES!
Larry
sorry man, i can't really speak taht well in meetings, i have the smooth sentence cohesion of Yoda
Mike
so im looking at similar dinign room sets online to the one that I want on craigslist and Im think damn...I can get a new one for nearly the same price
Sam
if leo become direktor, i guess they'll have to hire someone else to answer the registrars phone
Mike
turns out, the prices Im looking at are for the table only and the chairs are 175$ a piece on top of that
Mike
hahaha matt
Larry
are you feeling cheated the way that Yoda felt cheated out of properly training Luke before he cut his trainign short and went to Bespin to save his friends (even though he KNEW it was a trap?)
Sam
hahahaha
Sam
that changes things
Mike
yeah...well...we know how that turned out in the end
Larry
you know how that turned out in the end jsut like how Yoda knew Anakin would turn out because he was giving in to fear, which turns to anger, which leads to hate, and that way lies the dark side?
Sam
jay is on a roll
Mike
in the words of the chancellor/emperor..." GOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDD"
Mike
best part of the movie
Mike
"GOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDD"
Larry
no, best part of the movie is when former Senator Palpatine looks at Luke in an overtly pedophilic manner, then says "Oooh, I can feel your anger, pick up your light saber and STRIKE HIM DOWN."
Larry
Am I on a roll like the assault droids used to take over the capital city of naboo which have their own GODDAMN SHIELD GENERATORS?!?!
Mike
he looked at Anakin and said that YOU FUCKING NO)BCAEK!!
Sam
no bracket bcaek
Sam
wtf
Larry
stop perverting the movie like Palpatine perverted the fear Anakin felt for Padma's safety into a desire to join the Dark Side.
Larry
i need more lines to feed off of like the Rancor monster needed enemies of Jabba the Hut to feed
Larry
DON"T JUST LEAVE ME DANGLING HERE LIKE A BLIND HAN SOLO DANGLING OVER A HOVER SKIFF OVER TEH JAWS OF TEH TENTACLED MOUTH SAND THING!
Sam
ahhh, your weakness
Sam
we can starve you into silence
Mike
hahah
Mike
like the ...
Mike
Im enjoying this like Lando Calrissian enjoy a nice cold, smooth Colt 45
Mike
enjoys
Mike
dammit
Larry
why would you starve me into silence just like how yoda tried to starve luke when he visited him on Dagobah by giving him that nasty stew that he couldn't eat. Even though it was CLEAR that yoda preferred Luke's sort of food since he stole a ration off him when LUke crash landed his x-wing that he couldnt' raise by the force but Yoda could and make him look like a Mike, i mean a n00b.
Larry
you mean your'e enjoying this like Lando enjoys BETRAYING THE ENTIRE REBEL ALLIANCE JUST TO KEEP HIS FILTHY CONTROL OF HIS SKY CITY THAT"S EVENTUALLY WRENCHED FROM HIS TRAITOUROUS< GREEDY HANDS?!?!
Larry
everyone has a weakness just like the 2nd Death Star had to keep its field generator on the mildly defended planet of Endor.
Sam
Mike is make some deal like when....
Sam
making
Sam
does she ever
Larry
is Mike making a deal like how the Trade Federation made a deal with Count Dooku to overthrow the Republic?
Larry
I heard that, I heard that like some people in the cantina on Tatooine had heard that the Millenium Falcon could do the Kessel Run in less thatn twelve parsecs.
Mike
tweleve parsecs?!
Mike
-e
Larry
LESS THAN
Larry
so like, 11.8, 11.7
Larry
fuck,it could be 3 for all we know
Sam
"did you see anything while i was dancing?"
Larry
oh, that was funny like how the pre-industrial civilization fo Ewoks were able to defeat the clone army of the republic using nothing but large logs, a teddy bear like physique, and an indomitable spirit that made very single hard core ewoks fan want to STAB THEMSELVES IN THE ANUS HOLE.
Mike
thats called losing your audience
Larry
hehe, yeah, like who the Senate lost all it's floating delegate boxes because Emperor Palpatine used his dark forces to HURL THEM LIKE FRISBEES at yoda
Larry
i need some material over here, i'm dying a slow death, like how Vader slowly chokes the life out of his victims, particularly imperial fleet captains who mock the Force.

The Taint of Wallpaper

Sam says (2:22 PM):
rona
Sam says (2:22 PM):
home depot
Sam says (2:22 PM):
Wallpapers R Us on lonsdale
Mike says (2:23 PM):
GET OUT

Sam says (2:23 PM):
World of Wallpaper on esplanade
Sam says (2:24 PM):
Ricks Wallpaper Emporium on 2nd
Larry says (2:24 PM):
can't you get some shit free on CL?
Mike says (2:24 PM):
is that a general question?
Sam says (2:25 PM):
i have some
Sam says (2:25 PM):
i cannot help removing it though
Mike says (2:25 PM):
like you cant stop yourself from removing it?
Mike says (2:26 PM):
Is this a habit that you needed to share?
Sam says (2:26 PM):
yes
Sam says (2:26 PM):
it starts with a little corner
Sam says (2:26 PM):
a little rip
Larry says (2:26 PM):
are you talking about your need to peel off my pants when noone is watching?
Larry says (2:27 PM):
because i STILL belive that that disorder is TREATABLE
Larry says (2:27 PM):
if by no other course of action than by me getting Rip Proof slacks
Mike says (2:27 PM):
or treatable by just letting me do it
Larry says (2:27 PM):
....
Larry says (2:27 PM):
every time you say it's the last time
Larry says (2:28 PM):
then again, it does help me expose my taint to the air
Sam says (2:28 PM):
well stop putting your pants back on
Larry says (2:28 PM):
i told Lorrie that joke, but i can't remember why i was talking about exposing my taint to the air
Larry says (2:28 PM):
the joke fell flat
Mike says (2:28 PM):
really?
Mike says (2:28 PM):
Martha just LOVES the taint jokes
Larry says (2:29 PM):
for some reason, when i retell these jokes that go TOO FAR PAST THE LINE to Lorrie, she just sort of looks away, then idly twists her wedding ring, as if testing to see if it'll come off in one swift tug
Mike says (2:29 PM):
hahaha

This is how programmers get sick

Larry
so
Larry
on friday, i was feeling iffy
Sam
right
Larry
then on sunday, Mary is like, let's do that 2.3 km walk you do to the skytrain and have a day trip to Brentwood Mall
Sam
hahaha
Larry
i'm like, well, i'm a social recluse and shie from any sort of activity, so I figure I better do this before she leaves me for anyone with more personal acumen than a dying trout.\
Sam
hahaha, wise move
Larry
it's that day, of course, when we get three hundred fucking meteres of snow
Larry
it was a fucking hellish walk back
Sam
strollers and snow don't mix
Larry
i'm thinking it was going to end with me lighting a pipe, and saying, off-handedly yet in a decidedly constrained way, "I'm going for a walk, I won't be back for a bit."
Larry
anyhoo, she had a good time
Larry
oh, baby was in a backpack
Sam
oh nice
Larry
she thought it was a magical wonderland
Larry
i thought they were going to findour frozen corpses in the spring
Sam
slightly eaten by coyotes

Yes sir, Director sir

Larry
so why isn't Jim working from home?
Larry
why am i left to be a sore thumb?!
Sam
he said the paint smell is not that bad over there
Larry
but still, an excuse to work from home!
Sam
if the kids were school age, i'd be there
Larry
you can't just make idle promises like that
Larry
in five years, i'll remember, and test you
Larry
assuming of course, that you aren't PM Jones or Director Jones by that time
Sam
i'd make people address me that way too
Sam
Mr Director Sir
Larry
you should start now
Sam
hahaha
Sam
maybe announce it at the systems meeting
Sam
i'd like be addressed as Mr Jones
Sam
break them in gently
Larry
yes, slowly
Larry
or, alternatively, you can change your first name
Larry
to Misturduhrektorsur
Larry
say it's a homage to your german heritage
Larry
saxon heritage, even better
Sam
hahaha
Larry
teutonic leanings, even better

Multi-Lingual

Mike
just have Larry reply to her in Klingon
Larry
If it ain't broken, or cannot be traced to us...
Larry
what makes you think I know Klingon ? HUH?
Mike
oh...a hunch
Larry
just because I'm fluent in Cardassian
Larry
the two languages aren't even remotely related, you fucking ignoramus!
Larry
oh, who's looking stupid NOW!?
Mike
bloggerable

Processes

Sam
shouldn't this go to our pm to decide?
Sam
i'll forward it to Mather
Larry
i thought it was CharlieBrown?
Mike
have Mather forward it to CharlieBrown
Mike
that should eat up about 3 months
Jim
we should formalize our email forwarding process first.
Larry
haha
Sam
Nobody has told us officially
Sam
i'm on it
Jim
werd
Larry
we haven't formalized our formalizing process
Mike
Dear Jane,
Your email has been entered into our formalized email forwarding process.

Regards,

WhackaDoodle Group
Sam
Do not reply to this email.
Mike
ever
Mike
Someone may or may not be in touch with you
Sam
Our process is to fwd the email to the group and then assume another team member is dealing with it
Sam
Done
Larry
once our Nominating A WhackaDoodle Group Personnell to Contact Other Developers process has been formalized
Larry
our process sounds strikingly like our current process
Mike
APSPCOD
Sam
if it aint broken
Mike
NAPSPCOD
Jim
and even if it is...

High on A&W...

Mike says:
how do we continually succeed to put absolute shit into production?
Jim says:
we're just *THAT* good
Mike says:
its like we dont even have to try
Jim says:
exactly
Jim says:
like we don't even have to try...
Jim says:
anybody not from here can not understand how I actually accomplish something here by not doing anything.
Jim says:
just taking up a seat
Mike says:
you actually accomplish MORE than others by not doing anything
Mike says:
theyre in a race backwards

It started off clean, anyways...

Mike
he's very sick you know
Sam
i know Boss Man told me
Jim
*cough* *cough*
Mike
*choke* *choke*
Sam
she said, well when you go to places like that
Mike
haha
Larry
that is, places outside of the Golf Club.
Sam
although his drinking water was probably clearer than ours
Mike
werd
Mike
turbids everywere
Jim
and waaaaayyyy fewer fruit flies
Larry
that's where the taste is
Jim
you'd think my system would be stronger after so many months in that cubicle.
Mike
ahhaha
Larry
stronger only against those specific coffee bred pathogens
Mike
health depravation chamber you mean
Jim
haha
Larry
so is Jim msning us from atop of whistler or something?
Mike
he named his couch Whistler?
Jim
uhhhh
Jim
couch?
Mike
go Larry go!
Sam
haha
Larry
hahhahh
Larry
it's the name of the blowup doll that has that tiny leak. she goes 'eeeeeee' if you put too much pressure on her.
Jim
we're at the point where I don't even have to say anything and everybody knows what I mean.
Larry
er, so i hear.
Mike
or that
Mike
here comes something about extra long straps for the dildo so it can be strapped to a couch
Larry
wow, where the fuck you going with THAT Mike?
Mike
im takin it down to brown town
Sam
you share dolls?
Larry
well, i dont' have my own, and i usually clean whistler up pretty well. unless i'm in a rush
Larry
(which i usually am, come to think of it)
Sam
i bet you do
Larry
(tell whistler i really DID have an early meeting i needed to get to, and i just lost her number)
Sam
it appears whistler has moved on, Larry
Larry
well, she's currently under Jim, so that's understandable
Larry
SHE"S NOT FOR BOUNCING Jim
Mike
be gentle
Larry
she also hates it when you say "Wheeeee!"
Jim
why do I punish myself so?
Sam
mmmm Bouncing Jim
Mike
haha
Mike
she also likes to cuddle
Mike
a rare trait in a blow up doll
Larry
always so wham bam, deflate me and put me away in my waterproof case
Mike
you have to ask permission to leave this conversation
Jim
hmmm

Sam has left the conversation.

Sam has been added to the conversation.

Larry
just like you have to ask whistler to 'play'

Jim has left the conversation.

Mike
cheeky
Mike
Larry blogify this
Larry
we can never talk about skiiing ever again.
Larry
well done Larry, you fucking jerk.

Be Funny... NOW!

Mike
we should prolly post a conversation to the blog
Mike
ok GO!
Sam
you can't just force these things
Sam
go
Mike
yes you can. Over
Larry
i'm saving up all my banter for Mr. Smith
Mike
"banter"
Mike
its BATTER
Larry
he doesn' tlike his witty conversations 're-used'
Larry
or as he likes to say, "I don't like sloppy seconds"
Larry
at least, i think he was talking about conversation
Larry
you can never be too sure, what with his smooth deliver and outrageously expensive pants.
Mike
man
Mike
I am funny
Larry
fuck, you bring the funny at whim
Mike
funneh
Jim
yes, you certainly think you are.
Larry
i concur
Mike
shouldn't you be getting de-loused?
Jim
shouldn't you?
Mike
is it Tuesday already?

Electrical iPhone Chai Latte

Sam
so, have you stopped drinking coffee now
Sam
are you a chai latte guy now
Larry
i'm drinking my coffee now
Larry
it's only two days old
Larry
and as cold as a well embalmed corpse
Sam
nice
Sam
my mate just got an iphone
Larry
does he like it?
Sam
loves it
Larry
does he love it because he just spent a fair chunk of change on it?
Larry
or does he genuinely love it, and find he spends the better portion of his day sitting at a Starubucks, with his iPhone, screen up on the table in front of him, while he pretends to peruse the most impenetrable works of Proust?
Sam
he loves it because it has an awesome ui and using the touch screen is just so natural
Sam
his company bought it
Larry
ahhh
Sam
oh the tension
Larry
like a high energy electrical transmission wire, poorly insulated, and 30 feet lower than prescribed by safety regulations.

The Falklands

Sam
$11 hamburger
Mike
hey...thats the price you pay for over floured ciabatta bread
Larry
and free range organic no-cruelty argentinian unmodified prairie cattle
Mike
yeah
Sam
no one mentioned argie to me
Sam
i'm not coming
Sam
fucking argies
Mike
haha
Larry
oh right
Larry
that whole island on the other side of the world that you two countries really care about and that frankly sounds like a hidden isle from Middle-Earth
Sam
the one that is ours
Mike
was
Sam
sorry?
Mike
yes you are
Mike
didnt you hear the latest?
Sam
no
Mike
The Brazilians have taken it over and are using it as a training island for the next World Cup.
Mike
Ooo the irony
Larry
well, you get your dwarves together fromt he Underkingdom, and make sure your alliances from Rivendale hold strong, like so many plates of mithril, and go get yourself that island.
Sam
now, that almost worked
Sam
all the rocks and hills will help improve their ball control, i see
Mike
indeed

Too Busy Watching 'Steel Magnolias'

Larry
Link to a scene from Braveheart.
Larry
*sniff*
Mike
never seen it
Larry
you are dead to me.
Larry
next wii lunch we should see this
Larry
or maybe schedule a MARATHON OF MANLY MAN MOVIES for christmas
Larry
so little Mikey can see all the movies he should have fucking seen
Larry
you're about to get your Man Card pulled buddy.
Mike
mmm

Gang Violet

Mike
YES YES YES!!!
http://www.yourtvlinks.com/file/6622-80039s-gang-fight.html
Jim
it's back, baby
Larry
werd.
Mike
The Falcons get to make the rules
Larry
is this Mr. Belvedere?
Mike
haha
Mike
listen close to the lyrics
Larry
sweet, the kids from Fame and Thriller are coming ti KICK SOME ASS (then have buttsecks)
Larry
i don't have to listen to th elysrics to know its' about colourful, ethnic sodomy.
Larry
MOVE THOSE HIPS
Larry
oh yeah, tha'ts not gay at all.
Larry
"nono, not a dark, menacing purplse. Do you have a lavender? Or a mauve?"
Larry
this prolly started the Blood vs. Crips bloodbath. fuck, even I"m pissed off at their protrayal of urban violence.
Larry
bout ready to get my gat and my nine and drive by a few whities myself now
Jim
what do you think his threads are worth once we kill him and strip himdown

says the web savvy veteran....

Jim says:
http://www.thecomedynetwork.ca/shows/showdetails.aspx?a=b&u=1&sid=3351&c=CA&time=1194296927&hash=d02b107867538128517b04ba9859a75c
Jim says:
play the nov 1 clip 3 of 3
Mike says:
UR LYNX SUCKZORZ
Larry says:
OH MY GOD! LARN HOW 2 INTERNET!!!
Larry says:
which interview is it?
Larry says:
Mike
Larry says:
which interview is it?

Halloween at Larry's place

Larry says:
what did your kids dress up as?
Mike says:
Spongebob, Winnie the Pooh and Simba
Larry says:
i had a han solo trick or treat our place. it was awesome
Mike says:
you invite them in?
Larry says:
Simba? lion king is still popular?
Mike says:
no..but cheap
Mike says:
I love the look of the parents faces as they wait by the curb and you usher their kids inside
Larry says:
well, naturally, if they can roll a natural 20, and can define what a high constitution might mean, and what races have a +3 modifier to it. Then yes.
Larry says:
ah, cheap is king indeed
Larry says:
it's best if you lick your lips as you invite them in
Larry says:
and if you're not wearing any pants
Mike says:
hahah
Mike says:
answer the door naked
Larry says:
well, yeah, that's the trick
Mike says:
treat to follow

Columnist

Larry
i'll pass, after overcoming my fear of needles, i'm going to find out what all the fuss is about this 'heroin' everyone is talking aboutl.
Larry
i figure it'll make a good subject for the Watercooler
Manward
call it smack talk with Larry
Larry
oh yeah!
Larry
that's a great name for my column
Sam
Larry's fight against addiction
Sam
addiction to the flu shot
Larry
Smack Talk With Larry
The new shipmentof China White is in. It has a nice nutty start, with a crunchy styrofoam high, before it dumps you pretty hard with a really tar like ending. On the plus side, I only dry heaved for 3 hours after going cold turkey on it, so you know it's pure.
Larry
it writes itself!@

The Short Answer

Sam
hey, what are ocz like
Larry
OCZ? as in the RAM?
Sam
well, sd memory
Larry
as in, what's their reputation?
Sam
yeah
Larry
so, like, what would the general geekery and technological community have to say about the overall stability, reliabilty,and performance of said brand, on aggregate, and on the whole, ignoring any and all anedotal outliers?
Sam
yes
Larry
If I get your meaning -- and please, correct me if I'm out of order, or if I've shaded your question with the wrong intent, that is to say, flavour -- then what you would like to ascertain from me is some sort of zeitgeist surrounding OCZ and the components they make. A barometer, if you will, of the company and it's feeling of ill or goodwill among the technology enthusiast crowd. Ignoring, of
Larry
course, enthusiasts who may have rigourous and frankly shocking loyatly to, shall we say, competitors brands. What you would like to get a sketch of, in short, is an answer to this question, "Is OCZ, good?"
Sam
Yes, a simple, good or bad will suffice. I do not need a detailed and thorough discussion of the pros and cons of said brand.
Larry
So you would not want to know, for instance, if hte local dealer of OCZ certified equipment is in fact a latent homosexual with an alarming collection of burro erotica? Or that, say, their current labour policies in the RAM production field are second to none?
Sam
Whilst intrigued by the Mexican food sounds Burro, I have no idea what it is and do not feel it will influence my decision on whether or not to purchase memory from said company. Nor do i particularly care for the labour policies, as I feel my being an "EveryDay Hero" allows me certain leeway in my purchasing decisions in this regard.
Larry
They're pretty good, I guess.
Sam
thanks

Excuses, excuses.

Mike
you have a kid..its the perfect excuse
Larry
hahaha
Mike
Yeah...sorry (last minute) Mias not feeling well
Mike
she just yakked up her sweet potatoes all over the dog
Larry
holy shit, you just made up that excuse on the spot, so smooth! so natural! you should write a book
Jim
I'm surprised they don't all want to just go somewhere cheap and buy you gin and take in all the hugs.
Larry
and they'll be like "wait, this isn't YOUR birthday Larry"
Larry
and i'll be like all puppy dog faced and be like "so.. no LAN party then?"
Mike
I'd love to write a book but Hudson is running a bit of a fever. He's got a bit of a rash on his cheek too which may be a sign of fifths disease. I really have to keep an eye on it. you understand right. Sorry.
Larry
i'm fucking astounded
Larry
you should be a Facebook application
Larry
need an excuse, click here
Larry
fucking rad.
Jim
"no I can't go. Mike's kid is not feeling well and she just yakked up her sweet potatoes all over the dog"
Mike
Thanks for clicking the button. Unfortunately I cannot create an excuse right now as it seem the Norwalk Virus has paid us, our kids and our dog a visit. Unless you have some handy tips for getting hotdog vomit out of bed spreads, I won't be able to talk to you for a bit.

Cottonophobia

Mike
required viewing NOW
Mike
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G45s4GJslGI&mode=related&search=
Larry
i guess it's when a large cotton ball made from frogs killed my entire family then ass raped my dog.
Mike
"dog"
Larry
and when the cotton man tries to choke me with the cotton, i realize.. oh yeah.. it'sjust oversized COCKS.
Larry
which explains why my son hates his toys...
Larry
who was swearing?
Larry
wtf?
Mike
it's weird...I never actually SEE Larry smoking crack
Larry
hahahHAHAHAHAHhaHaHHAHAH
Jim
haha
Larry
my sweaters are made of crack that's absorbed throught the skin
Jim
hahaha
Mike
"sweaters"
Mike
i got some sweaters
Sam
there is officially no safe word we can use
Mike
haha
Jim
"safe"
Larry
i'll get in YOUR safe baby
Larry
crack it
Larry
CRACK THAT SAFE!
Mike
Sweaters come in pairs and are delivered in a convenient skin pouch
Jim
Maury PWNS that bitch!
Jim
nice job.
Larry
seriously,wtf happened to her. some serious fucking trauma to be scared of cotton balls
Mike
im afraid of spies
Jim
stabbystabby
Larry
STABBY STABBY!!!!
Larry
i like to stab the engies when they are crouched....
Larry
bent right over that dispenser, oh yea

Bahrain, Syria, Whatever.

Jim
blogzored
Larry
how is that in anyway funny Jim?
Larry
THIS IS SERIOUS LIFE AND DEATH SHIT WE GOT GOING ON
Larry
you ask anyone, even your friend in Bahrain, he'll know
Larry
he'll be like, holy fuck, you guys were talking about advanced TF2 setnry gun placement?!
Jim
it's not Bahrain, dickhead. It's syria.
or the maldives.
and don't fuck with me.
Larry
and you'll be like 'I LULZ THEM!'
Jim
my syrian friends won't like it/.
Larry
and he'l be like 'I'VE GOT A DIRTY BOMB FOR YOUR ASS SPHINCTER YOU STUPID FGT NUB SHAFT!'"
Mike
hahah]
Larry
and you'll be like "NO PLAS! I LURV YOUR COUNTRY!"
Larry
and he'll be like "TAKE TF2 MORE FUCKING SRSLY! OK!? SRSLY!. fuckwad."
Jim
I'll be like, 'DON'T TASE ME, BRO!'
Larry
and it'll be tooo late
Larry
you'll already have a Uranium Colon Cleaning
Jim
what, that's it? That's all you got

NEEEERRRRRDDDDDSSSSS!!!!

Mike Says:
ragin drunk...gotta be home by 9
Mike Says:
for TF2
Larry Says:
holy fuck, youguys should start mastering the Get the Engie in IMPOSSIBLE PLACES skillz
Larry Says:
apparently you can crouch jump on the dispener
Mike Says:
link us to pics
Larry Says:
ppl get in pretty much SUPAR places
Mike Says:
but you need a 2nd person to set up near you
Larry Says:
and you can also set a TELEPORTER EXIT in weird spots that youc an't jump to, then build a teleporter entrance and get up there
Larry Says:
http://img160.imagevenue.com/img.php?image=22813_very_high_sg1_122_639lo.jpg
Mike Says:
so if they try to rocket your sentry, the other guy smokes em
Larry Says:
wha?
Larry Says:
oh right
Mike Says:
being an engy alone in 2fort is pretty much useless...soon as a heavy or soldier shows up with a medic, youre toast
Larry Says:
yeah
Mike Says:
whats the point of having that so high?
Larry Says:
you need to have ppl respond to your screams for help, at the very least
Larry Says:
a spy can't sap it
Mike Says:
it has no range and is a sitting duck
Larry Says:
and a demo man can't hit it
Larry Says:
i'm not sure what it's range is
Larry Says:
iv'e seen those placements before,t heyare pretty useful
Larry Says:
BUT if you can sneak by, it doesn't cover the cap point
Mike Says:
so whats the trick?
Larry Says:
a dispenser on the far right or left, crouch jump on the ledge
Mike Says:
can you jump on other players for a boost?
Larry Says:
nono, just onto the dispenser
Mike Says:
booo
Larry Says:
"Simply - crouch jump from trolley near computer bank, onto computer bank. Build dispenser. Crouch jump onto dispenser, jump, and place teleporter exit on the ledge above you. Destroy disp, make teleporter entrance, teleport up to that area, etc etc."
Larry Says:
only the engie can crouch jump onto his dispenser
Larry Says:
you know where a good offense place is? in 2fort, in the BAD GUYS sewers, where the health and ammo is
Mike Says:
so jump on "toss" the exit up
Larry Says:
then get a teleporter exit there
Larry Says:
no, the blueprint can be placed above where youc an jump, i guess
Mike Says:
no one uses the sewers but me on 2 fort
Mike Says:
always empty
Larry Says:
you obviously haven't played enought 2fort

Fruit or Vegetable?

TinTin says:
does Terminator even understand english?
Mike says:
lol
TinTin says:
is he even aware what language the rest of us speak?
Mike says:
nope
TinTin says:
i've had more comprehension from a tomato
Mike says:
i bet
Mike says:
you've probably had more sex from a tomato

Teleconferencing the Ajaxification of the Web

Larry
i'm having a blast, you are so jealous
Sam
is it good?
Larry
oh my god, so good
Sam
did you ajax shit up
Larry
fucking hellsyea
Larry
you know Neo in the matrix, when he learns Kung Fu? that's exactly what it's like
Larry
fucking downloading the techincal shit dawg.
Sam
sweet
Sam
so do you have Joe Smith?
Larry
yeha, he's fucking pimp dawg
Sam
he looks it
Larry
dear god, he's going over the basics of what AJAX is.
Larry
i did google maps integration!! I R SMART!! MOVE FASTER!
Sam
hey, he needs to fill the day
Sam
fill it
Larry
does he ever
Larry
wait.... what do you want me to 'fill'?
Larry
already/ so early in th emorning?
Larry
cheerful mike is here
Sam
oh really
Sam
that must brighten the mood
i wish was there with him
Larry
i feel like the air is infused with aerosoled Prozac, it's awesome
Larry
why don't you come join us/ theere's still room
Sam
we're only allowed one per team
Larry
*sighs like a martyr*
Larry
you can take my spot
Larry
nono, it's ok
Larry
go ahead and take it. it's the least i can do, after getting a ride home.
Sam
i've missed too much now
Sam
i'd never catch up
Sam
i'll just attend your presentation at the next systems meeting
Larry
oh, alright
Larry
you are so unselfish!
Sam
i know
Larry
literally crucifying your technical knowledge on the tree of Generosity.
Larry
i just had a cinnamonbun... the insulin spike is going to knock me out
Sam
enjoy your nap

Concentrated Meditations on Rodger

Larry
damnit, when was the last time I was sick
Larry
i have a baby!
Larry
a spewing, phlegmy, coughy baby!
Larry
WHERE IS MY PAYOFF?!
Sam
the love and enjoyment you get each day when holding and playing with your beautiful child
Larry
right..
Larry
so, no ETA on my sick days then?
Sam
that is in your hands
Larry
hey, does Rodger have a kid/wife?
he strikes me as someone who doesn't
Sam
he has a partner
Larry
hahahah
Larry
what do you mean, he has a partner
Larry
what are you insinuating?
Sam
absolutely nothing
Sam
all i know is he has a partner
Sam
and he likes to suck cocks
Sam
recall last line
Larry
hey, some ppl like to fry the chicken, and eat it slowly with their incisors, who am I to judge how he eats his fowl?
Sam
i think his partner is female
Larry
really?!
Larry
i mean..
Larry
that throws me for a loop
Larry
i assumed he still lives with his aunt who raised him, ever since his parents died in a rare safari off the coast of Borneo
Sam
ah
Sam
sorry to shatter the illusion
Larry
his aunt, who has an exotic predilection for all things voodoo, kept him on sick days through her liberal use of new orleans hot foods and a distaste for food safety
Larry
he found solace, early on, in computers. their cleanliness, their distinct desire to have nothing to do with auras or voodoo dolls.
Sam
wow, you think about Rodger a lot
Larry
at the age of 32, he finally found a career as a programmer, and has been happy ever since
Larry
but still lives at home.
Larry
his only chance at anything approaching a relationship was a tryst his former C++ instructor made at him. unfortunately, his instructor was from hardy czech farming stock, and Rodger had neither the sophistication nor the social depth to realize that 1) the instructor was a she and 2) that the instructor was making veiled passes at him to "instantiate HER object"
Larry
yes, i do.
Larry
he's an enigma

Use Another Server

Larry
hey assmonkey, preprod uses some Clickarray DEVILRY, so that the static shit comes from some unknown bastion of HELL
Larry
i suggest you build to integrate
Mike
nah
Larry
Jim just told me he'd kill me ten times over with his dinner fork if I ever bother him with such a ridiculous question.

Clown Bike

Sam
boredom beginning to set in
Larry
ihear ya
Sam
pre 9am boredom is the pits
Larry
mine was interruppted by the distinct feeling of utter worthlessness and depression. But thankfully the performance evaluation was relatively short
Sam
ahhh, yes. the knowledge that you have an awkward hour meeting to look forward to at some point where BOSS and your pm attempt to say positive things about
Sam
the whole time in your head you are picturing homer riding a clown bike with his pants falling down
Larry
hahah
Larry
except the clown bike is looking up at me saying "YOU SUCK!! IT"S A GOOD THING YOU WORK AT COMPANY ABC INC. OR YOU WOULD BE FIRED SO FAST YOUR TESTICLES WOULD SPIN!"
Larry
yes, testicles. they usuually don't spin, but the force and vigour of the firing would make my nether region like two competing gyro scopes
Sam
"HOMER MAKES YOU LOOK SO INCOMPETENT"
Larry
"IF HOMER WAS A REAL PERSON. AND BY REAL PERSON I MEAN A DROOLING, BRAIN DEAD HUMAN VEGETABLE, I"D HIRE HIM TO DO YOUR JOB TWENTY TIMES OVER! AND ALL BEFORE YOUR FIRST COFFEE BREAK!"
Sam
ahahahaha

MSN of a higher class

Larry
can't you say "I say old man, why don't we just go for a post of tea, why not! Now, I've been lead to belive you have taken a bit of a fancy for my MacBook Pro. Now, old man, it'd be an awfully good sport of you if you'd just sod off, you know."
Larry
i've been reading some Evelyn Waugh
Larry
apparently you english folks really talked like that in WW2
Sam
Look old man, some of us chaps still do talk like that. A fine state we'd be in if we all talked the way you yanks do. No, no, that would never do. More tea?
Larry
It's a right sporting way of conversing, if I may say so myself. May I? Mayn't I? Good show then. And I think I'll have a bit more of the Darjeely if you have any. Sharp as tacks, those punjabs to make such a spot on drink as tea, dont' you think?
Sam
It certainly hits the spot. You know, I was telling Maud the other day, wasn't I Maud, you can't beat a good cup of char. Not much use for anything else those punjabs, but they make a fine cuppa, What's that Maud?
Larry
Oh Maud is always spouting about the latest thing isn't she just? Such a card she is. Now say old man, what say we take a few days off and watch the semi-qualifying rounds for the 2007 Cricket Championships. I daresay there is a new bowler for Pakistan, he's got an arm he does.
Sam
Champion idea old bean. I'll have Maud knock us up some sandwiches and a few cakes for afternoon tea and perhaps a flask of Earl Grey. I say, I don't much fancy our boys chances out there against those Pakistanis. It's the food you know.
Larry
yeah, i'm pretty sure i can't keep this up

Change Agency!

Sam
then you can give them a demo
Sam
GB may have questions
Larry
may
Sam
you may need a strategy to deal with that
Larry
taht doesn't include punching him in the nards
Sam
first i recommend determining what kind of person he is, you know a what, why, big picture, etc and then tailoring you demo to him
Sam
good luck
Larry
haha
Larry
Just a birds eye view. Maybe whiteboard a few scenarios, communicate with a few stakeholders to tap into their domain expertise. Then maybe get a stand up meeting to figure how you want to comprehensively co-author the proper directives to enable fast and end-to-end change agency.
Sam
i sure hope Mike is getting all this
Sam
he's awfully quiet, i guess he is working on his demo

Hold. Still.

Sam
Neon wants CC and Noir to experiment
Sam
oh, my eyes, my eyes
Larry
hehhe, hawt!
Sam
ok, so you put this end of the tube there and i'll just....
Larry
hold a minute. JUST HOLD A MINUTE THERE
Larry
I haven't got it set UP! HOLD IT IN!! HOLD IT IN!!!!
Larry
damn, it's all slipperynow, i'll never get a grip on it
Sam
don't move, DON"T MOVE
Larry
maybe if i hold it in my teeth

Bloody shit

Jim:
I think I'm outta here.
Mike:
rgr
Jim:
if I stay it will be unpleasant for everybody involved.
Jim:
hopefully I don't pull a TinTin.
Mike:
i need money for lunch
Mike:
ahhh family
Larry:
you sick Jim?
Mike:
no YOU sick Jim
Larry:
or dracula is getting to you?
Jim:
stomach fuxored
Jim:
haha. yeah, if I stay the blood will be unpleasant for everybody.
Larry:
ah
Mike:
ah...like dinner time at my house
Jim:
hahah
Sam:
images, images
Larry:
blood and explosive diarrhea, sounds like a win for everyone involved
Mike:
wii lunch?
Jim:
plus if I puke I owe Apu 10 bucks
Mike:
i KNEW it
Sam:
if you puke, make it towards dracula
Mike:
yeah make him choke on it
Sam:
and i'll refund the $10
Jim:
ok. now I am going to puke.
Mike:
puke in his mouth while youre french kssing him
Sam:
i didn't say kiss him and ...
Larry:
jeeesus
Jim:
------------------ <-- line
Larry:
i turna way for a second and we have vomit homosexual french kissing
Mike:
and then with the diarrhea...
Sam:
did you not see the line
Larry:
EXPLOSIVE
Mike:
(sranwrap...you know...the usual)
Jim:





























Mike
Larry:
what line?
Larry:
except, without teh sarawrap
Mike:
so anyways...to make a solid (so to speak) Manhattan Transfer....
Larry:
heat transfers better without that barrier of plastic
Larry:
and to the urban dictinoary i go
Mike:
you dont have to email me pete
Larry:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=manhattan+transfer
Larry:
oh for FUCK's sake
Larry:
it just gets worst
Larry:
3 and 4.....
Mike:
#6
Sam:
"Stephen gave me a Manhattan Transfer after hearing my story about the Holocaust."
Jim:
He gave her a manhattan transfer, allowing the free flow of feces between the two of them.
Sam:
wtf
Sam:
the example should make sense, surely
Mike:
Stephen gave me a Manhattan Transfer after hearing my story about the Holocaust.
Mike:


A man and a woman get into the "69" position and unload a nice thick log into each others mouth.
Mike:
just had to paste that
Larry:
nice thick log.
Jim:
ok.
Jim:
I'm definitely out.
Larry:
man, i'll never be able to read up on forestry news ever again
Mike:
Travis wanted to try a Manhattan Transfer but we didn't have a straw so he just farted on my balls.
Larry:
two anal cavities...
Larry:
HAHAHAH
Sam:
i now understand what Mike is trying to do with the hackey sack
Jim:
fuckin travis.
Mike:
haha
Jim has left the conversation.


Larry:
and with the straw
Sam:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Lincoln+tunnel
Sam:
Mike is attempting to combine this with the Manhattan transfer
Mike:
well duh
Larry:
so.. .. uh. yeah.

Pwnd!

216 is laughable

Jim says:
134 biznatch
Sam says:
bastard
Sam says:
game on
Sam says:
133, fuck!
Jim says:
327
Sam says:
damn, 213
Sam says:
give me a break
Jim says:
haha
Sam says:
Mike's 216 seems laughable now
Jim says:
yes, it does.
Sam says:
381

Jim says:
damn
Jim says:
you must have a sore wrist.

Not non hell

Sam:
noisy people are so annoying
Mike:
the worst part is that Star Trek Alien thinks she's helping
Sam:
it's ok if you are funny noisy, but just noisy, booooo
Mike:
she has no fucking clue how to turn on her computer
Sam:
she is not non annoying me
Mike:
Do you wish you were giving birth right now?
Mike:
or swinging a basebat bat?
Sam:
hahaha
Mike:
i find her definitely non irr-annoying
Mike:
fuck
Sam:
this is more painful than child birth
Mike:
i gotta get rid of that
Mike:
and now Hag is here
Mike:
thats like the finishing move
Mike:
Hag and Star Trek Alien
Sam:
i imagine this is what it sounds like in hell
Mike:
killer
Mike:
haha

Bloc Rules

1. Tintin shall be browbeaten relentlessly.
2. Larry is not addicted to gin, he only prefers it to water.
3. Any mention of football will always be assumed to be the British understanding of it. Not what those poncy Americans would have you believe.
4. Mike's children are known as either 'promising stuntmen' or 'those great excuses for buying Gameboys and other gamesystems that no straight man would allow himself within 100 meters of'.
5. Do not taunt Jim's Prius.
6. Do not hack Jim's Prius.
7. It's generally understood that you do not bring up Mike's failed audition for "Way Fast, Way Furious, The Revenge of the Sprint".
8. It's good form to wait until Larry has finished his 3000 word msn response to a one line quip.
9. Jim loves children. Far, far away from him.
10. Sam keeps a lead pipe under his desk for anyone who doesn't share his opinion of football. He doesn't even have the decency to clean the blood and slightly dried brains from it.
11. All msn conversations will eventually degrade to a point where those with the weakest stomach for auto-erotic asphixiation with a oranguatan nail-file will quit.
12. Those weakest will be added until all and every possible disgusting reference can be hashed out in detail.

AFK

Jim
Larrys not even there...
Mike
his Mom will read this
Jim
he has the liquid bird thing going
Sam
just putting his muumuu on
Mike
and clipboard full of overwritten sentences
Jim
and a pit bull hanging from his throat
Mike
two birds...ctrl and V

Trousers

Larry
so, yeah, you still owe me a Blog Topic
Sam
i'm still thinking
Sam
why do they still make trousers, sorry pants, with button up flys
Sam
i mistakenly bought a pair
Sam
they have a belt on that is a bugger to undo as well
Sam
so now when i go to the washroom i run the risk of someone seeing me grunting and groaning with my crotch as i try to unbutton/button up my fly
Sam
it's no better if i use the cubicle, in fact i think its worse
Sam
see my head above the door as i thrash around mumbling "get in there" to that last stubborn button....not good
Larry
hahhAHHHAhAhaHAHHA

Great minds think alike.

Jim Says:
man. breakfast was good.
Jim Says:
I really needed that.
Jim Says:
I'll buy you breakfast tomorrow at the pendulum... definitely worthwhile.
Mike Says:
haha
Mike Says:
nice
Mike Says:
i accept
Jim Says:
it's a date then - 8:30 at the pendulum
Mike Says:
werd
Jim Says:                  Mike Says:
you better put out.    will I have to put out?

Wrap It

Mike
fuckin uber comment complete
Larry
holy shit that's a long comment
Mike
thats what she said
Mike
you can basically wrap that in java tags and release it
Larry
hahahahHAHAH
Larry
yeah, the good old java tags
Mike
hahaha
Larry
is there anything they can't do?
Larry
fuck, i'm LOLing over here
Mike
hahah

Lurid Details

Larry
Mike, my apple laptop is here! can you go dog the bounty hunter on it?
Mike
hahaha
Mike
i should put him in a chicken wing
Larry
is that with the pepper spray or without?
Mike
chicken wing with a full face press against the wall
Mike
top of the shoulder holding his skull still
Larry
uh.. hey now.. no need to get into the lurid details
Mike
then I'd slowly unzip his pants....
Larry
i'm sure there will be sweating, maybe a few tentative games of leapfrog, i don't need to know

Apple Customer Support

Mike
Dear iTunes,

PLease play my CD without fucking copying the entire fucking thing to the hardrive.
Mike
Thanks,
Mike
Larry
Dear Mike,
We are Apple. We make brand identity over priced and mega hyped products for you iLife and digital E-Future. We know what's best for you. You better get used to the idea that everything we think of and consider, even if it is a steaming jetstream of diarhea, is goddamn cool because we'll put it in clear plastic and use a slighly grey Arial fucking font.
Apple
Mike
i-future asshole

pardon my french.

mike says:
fuck
mike says:
regi status
mike says:
need in vw
jim says:
fuck. I thought it was there.
mike says:
fuck. Its not
jim says:
fuck. I thought it was.
mike says:
fuck. You thought wrong
jim says:
fuck. it is.
jim says:
fuck. it's regn_status_code
jim says:
fuck, you fucking fuck.
mike says:
fuck. Im an idiot
mike says:
fuck. I couldnt pull toad up fast enough
jim says:
fuck. hahaha

Friends of the Staffroom strike again.

Sam Says:
we will be twinning it with a staffroom in Kyoto soon
Sam Says:
hahah
Larry Says:
twinning?
Larry Says:
oh. ahah
Jim Says:
"sister staffroom with University of ButtFuck Japan"
Larry Says:
sorry, took a bit of a leap for me there.i can only shudder at the 'gathering' of 3 people who are going to be eating cake morosely while making safe and non-committal comments about some blurry shot of a daffodil

The Understated Ambiton Of The British

Larry
what's youre take on it?
i'm pretty ambivalent
Sam
oh i'm all for it
i'm so on that team
Highly Technical But Pragmatically Foolish Technologydo interest me, purely because they are new and probably a good thing to have on your cv
Larry
uhhh
i can't argue with that... but.. uh.. i dunno
i'm confused now
Sam
i don't want to join really
Larry
sorry, i know your real feelings on the matter
Sam
it will involve lots of travelling and meetings and shit
Larry
i know your reserved british ways will not allow you to admit your ardour for all thigns Highly Technical But Pragmatically Foolish Technology and High Minded and Idealized Corridor to Mountains of Bureacracy . i will be your advocate.
Sam
plus we'll have a bunch of tards working on it too
Larry
no matter what your protestations. i will be steadfast. on that you can count.
Larry
i will summon on my email writing skills (of which there is not much), and beseech all the powers that be that you are indeed, the best and first choice for both taking over john's position as head of Highly Technical But Pragmatically Foolish Technologyas well as being the 'go-to' man on High Minded and Idealized Corridor to Mountains of Bureacracy
Larry
fear not. your desires shall be made known. shall be shouted from teh proverbial hills until those with the powers to change your fates have taken heed.
Larry
what good fortune you do have in having a dear friend as myself
Sam
maybe i should sit next to Josh as well
Larry
championing your inner desires and ambitions
Larry
that shall be done!
Larry
nest to the man from the Celestial Lands you will be.
Sam
haha
Larry
i hve a strong urging to empty my lower humours into the porcelain cistern, i shall return
Sam
i will now write me own message on my board "19 days to go"
Larry
19 days until your ascension into the halls of power that you so crave.

There's a new sherrif in town.

Mike says:
man..i am teetering on the brink of anal leakage
Jim says:
uh
Mike says:
about to stamp out some rusty sherrifs badges soon

Scratching your head or your ass?

Mike says:
devl is soooooFUCKWED!
Mike says:
-W
Mike says:
cant add courses at all
Sam says:
no it's fuckweded alright
Mike says:
heheh
Sam says:
nice early start by the cardinal
Mike says:
hahah
Mike says:
probably spent the morning removing his head from his ass
Mike says:
then again...maybe not
Mike says:
TRYING to
Sam says:
first he spent an hour wondering why his put his head up there in the first place
Mike says:
hahahah

Humour is in the eye of the be.holder

Sam says:
Connection con = null;
con = DBAccess.getConnection();
DUInstructor.updateEmail(con, email, id);
Sam says:
i refuse to close my connections
Jim says:
hehe

Poost

Oooo heaven is a place on earth...

Jim says:
wtf?
Mike says:
*shrug*
Mike says:
i just work here
Mike says:
i dont work here at all
Jim says:
I just sit here.
Sam says:
i just watch tv here
Mike says:
any of you remember the real world?
Jim says:
the wha?!?!
Mike says:
if I felt like this in the real world...oh man...that deadline would be fucke
Mike says:
d
Mike says:
at least I can sit here and watch the spots on my monitor in relative peace
Sam says:
surely you mean the sports on your monitor

Girls just wanna have fun...

Sam says:
i think i might have just triggered the ops email
Mike says:
dyslexics of the world...UNTIE!
Mike says:
geez Sam
Jim says:
dumbass
Jim says:
you some kinda nub or what?
Mike says:
nooblet
Sam says:
it appears so
Sam says:
no i think i managed to sneak it in
Mike says:
i can picture the guys over in ops, throwin poo at each other and then a big bell rings and they all stop as the email comes in...the smart one starts to read it..
Mike says:
and then they all get one word each in the reply
Mike says:
and the smart one has to arrange them
Sam says:
so it's pretty similar to here
Mike says:
only difference is, they have a smart one
Sam says:
ahhhh
Sam says:
and we just have a smartass one

Just another manic Monday...

Mike says:
who's busier?
Jim says:
not me.
Mike says:
ok
Jim says:
I can pretty much guarantee that.
Mike says:
well..if it were between me and you...
Jim says:
hahah
Mike says:
email
Sam says:
the studio pundits for the footy on GuangDong Sports each wear the team outfits
Sam says:
they look very odd
Mike says:
ahhh....i guess you were wrong Jim

Supperfucked! (aka. Lemon Dream Bar)

Jim Says:
this whole thing is supperfucked
Mike Says:
hahah
Mike Says:
you dont even know the severity of supperfucking
Jim Says:
supperfucked with a 9" Lemon Dream Bar.
Mike Says:
There's nothing as pure as the kindness of an Athiest / The's nothing a sure as a razor blade above your wrist
Mike Says:
heavy lyrics
Jim Says:
haha
Jim Says:
I take it you're not listening to boot liquor?
Mike Says:
i am
Jim Says:
wow. they've gotten deeper.
Mike Says:
hehe
Mike Says:
I'm not gonna cry....I'm gonna smile....Cuz it felt so good to watch her die
Jim Says:
hahaha
Jim Says:
the lyrics bounce right back.
Mike Says:
heheheh
Jim Says:
I only got 17 days vacation left.
Mike Says:
her bare hands clutching at the breeze
Jim Says:
fucksores.
Mike Says:
hahah
Mike Says:
fucksores ajajja
Mike Says:
ooo
Mike Says:
spanish laughter
Jim Says:
hahaha
Mike Says:
man..I am just feeding SISC prod dse the lemon dream bar
Mike Says:
its like snaking a drain
Mike Says:
haha only 14.5 days left
Mike Says:
after booking a fucking month
Mike Says:
hahaha
Jim Says:
hahaha
Jim Says:
can I have some?
Mike Says:
ok
Jim Says:
(days, not lemon dream bar)
Mike Says:
riiiight
Mike Says:
this place
Mike Says:
.

Quality is Job, uh, 452.

tintin says:
okay so how'd the stuff i did on the 9th break things today?
tintin says:
keep the swearing to a minimum
jim says:
SRV???
jim says:
is a super critical class
jim says:
and it's now super fucked
tintin says:
ooops
tintin says:
just looked
jim says:
hahaha
tintin says:
that wasn't supposed to get checked int
tintin says:
oh shit
jim says:
yeah.
jim says:
it looked like a pretty fucked up checkin
tintin says:
most of it was just stuff for later
tintin says:
but the SRV??? change was a random servlet i changed to est something once it was deployed

Internal Staff Web Site : Posts

Larry
oh man, SO MANY THINGS I WANT ON THAT LIST:
CHEAP Snowboard and Bindings for Sale
Larry
if there is ANYTHING you want to skimp on, the part that links your hurtling body to the only thing giving you a modicum of control is DEFINITELY it. CHEAP snowboard bindings, is like 'open sesame' to my wallet!
Sam
Those rod tickets are just a steal now
Larry
someone should let Lisa know that she can never reduce the price enough
Sam
maybe she should get together with the mexico trip
Sam
and bindings
Larry
throw it all together
Sam
so thats dangerously cheap bindings a gay abuse trip to mexico and rod tickets $100 the lot

Timbits

Mike
Timbits arent gonna get themselves..chowar d
Tintin
hahaha
Larry
do we need to add an item to your Outlook Calendar?
Mike
Acting Directors ALWAYS get the timbits
Tintin
who ARE you?
Sam
Just delegate the task Tintin
Larry
you can either be The Most Beloved Temporary Acting Director or be clumped with all the Mildly Reviled Temporary Acting Directors
Larry
which one is it going to be?
Mike
send Dracula for them
Tintin
Sam can you please go get me some timbits thanks
Sam
fuck you
Mike
(all the jelly ones will have fang marks in them)
Larry
see, what's going to happen if one of US goes to get it
and you look like a lameass timbit tightwad
Sam
and the others, well lets not go there
Tintin
isn't that what the little hole is?
Larry
OH MAN Tintin remember THAT weekend?!
Tintin
NO!
Larry
I AIN"T NO PROCTOLOGIST!
Sam
Could have fooled me
Sam
if fact you did fool me
Larry
"Tintin
isn't that what the little hole is?" followed by, "Have you had yoru prostate checked? would you?"
Larry
i didn't fool you, you knew all along, you LET yoruself be fooled!
Larry
your prostate is healthy, btw
Sam
that is a a relief
Larry
was for me
Tintin
it's only healthy cause I don't eat timbits
Larry
release, i mean
Larry
oh dear lord, look where i'm going all because Tintin won't get fucking timbits
Mike
you mean you dont GET timbits
Larry
no one is asking you to eat them
Sam
oh he'll get fucking them
Mike
uh Sam
switch get and fucking around

IMDb's 100 Worst Movie Titles, Part V

Larry
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076191/
worst. super hero. ever.
Jim
uh, I think Thunderpants takes that title.
Larry
i think you are confusing worst with "most likely to make a killing as a porn star"
Mike
"Help help! Im being robbed"
--Melting man enters from alley
--melts
"Help help! Im being robberd!"
Jim
hmm. interesting. not sure what kind of porn you watch Larry
Sam
i'm intrigued how his farting leads him to death row
Larry
Jim: ALL OF IT
it's fucking exhausting
Mike
fuck me...Thursday is officially written off
Jim
yeah, that passing wind porn can get tiresome.
Larry
We like to call it pre-fornication flatulence, you uncultured bigot!

IMDb's 100 Worst Movie Titles, Part IV

Larry
oh damn, Laserblast
fuck me that should have broken box office records
CEO :"What's better htan a laser, PEW PEW PEW laser! I mean, cool right? My grandkids love that stuff"
OverPaid Writer: "It needs more pop, more pizazz.."
They look at eacher other, and exclaim together:"LASERBLAST!"

IMDb's 100 Worst Movie Titles, Part III

Mike
I have no idea how Teen Wolf Too could have flopped. I mean, cmon, Jason Bateman is WAAAYY better than Michael J Fox
Jim
hehe
Sam
and a cameo by donald trump
Jim
and his hair?
Mike
hahahah
Sam
no his hair refused
Larry
it's the palsy, it makes him mroe DYNAMIC

IMDb's 100 Worst Movie Titles, Part II

Larry
"Ghosts Can't Do It"
Mike
The Touch of Satan
Larry
well SHIT! i wanna know what the fuck it's talking about
Tintin
well duh...
Larry
"Only her desire can make him rise again "
Larry
AHHAHAHAHAH
Mike
haha
Jim
HAHAHAHA

IMDb's 100 Worst Movie Titles, Part I

Larry
i don't think it's a coincidence that the bottom 100 movies have the top 100 best titles. ever.
Tintin
new game movie or urban dictionary term
Shanghai Surprise
Mike
hahaha
Jim
hahah. BUKAKE!
Larry
formerly known as Thailand Turnaround
Tintin
hahahahaha

Not playing with a full deck

Sam says:
so, it services has a house of cards as well as us.
Sam says:
i bet ours is bigger and less stable
Mike says:
AND on TOP of theirs
Jim says:
we have a house of glass cards.
Sam says:
and we keep throwing stones
Jim says:
and the WebServices team has a slingshot
Sam says:
Yeah that WS team
Mike says:
not so much a sligshot as a need for a few of the glass cards near the bottom
Jim says:
pardon?
Sam says:
they like to reuse the bottom cards
Mike says:
by placing them on the top
Mike says:
fuck you and your pardon
Jim says:
they're playing Jenga
Mike says:
only they're retarded
Mike says:
and lack motor skills
Sam says:
and have big boobs

W00t!

fuckin A!

Gear Shift

Sam
boy Drac likes to chat it up with chowrd
his breathy laughter is bugging me
Larry
nice
looks like choward has met his match
Sam
surely not, i think choward has another gear to go to
he's just cruising now
not cruising in the gay sense of the word, although
Larry
hahahah
Larry
hasn't 'kicked it up a notch' as it were?
Sam
exactly, wait till he grabs that stick and rams it into second
Larry
i'll listen carefully for the hungry engine hitting 7000 rpms
Drac won't even have time to rethink buckling in
he won't even have time to consider if his car has airbags
Sam
"his car has airbags" is that a euphemism for some gay sex aid
Larry
you certainly have your mind filled up, nay, engorged with gay sexual thoughts
Larry
that and cars
i think there maybe a black and white french art house movie that will fulfull all your needs
Sam
fast cars and gay sex that me
Larry
it's like peanut butter and wrestling
Sam
it's why i'm married with a crv
Sam
i think i've been working with Mike for too long
Larry
torturing yourself, as it were
Larry
i think you maybe working for Mike for too long

1337 Marketable skill(z)

Mike Says:
now if youll excuse me I have to shot gun some beer and hem some curtains
Mike Says:
MANLY curtains
Jim Says:
hahaha
Mike Says:
like..um...meat curtains
Jim Says:
hahaha
Mike Says:
yeah,,i gotta hem some meat curtains
Jim Says:
no idea what that could possibly mean.
Mike Says:
hahah
Jim Says:
just think of it as just one more marketable skill
Jim Says:
and good luck to you.
Mike Says:
haha
Mike Says:
one MORE?
Mike Says:
one.

This will be the last time an email trail gets transcribed for blogging purposes

Jim says:
hey.

Next week we should pretend like somebody is leaving the comforting
folds of Student Systems (maybe the cardinal or moobs - works well
with the idea of comforting folds...) and go out and get pissed and
play pool/darts/fooz/etc.

what would be a good day? Tuesday and Thursday are out.

jim.

Mike says:
Mmmm meaty folds.

Nancy says:
Thanks for that.

Jim says:
why did I put myself through this? I gotta remember to never instigate anything ever again.

Mike says:
Oh...and I can't make it on Tuesday or Thursday.

Nancy says:
so Thursday it is then.

TinTin says:
I'm sure you'll be moving it to Wednesday 'cause that's probably the
only day I can't make it.

Nancy says:
so Wednesday it is then.

Mike says:
I'm good for Wednesday

Larry says:
Is everyone allergic to Friday or something?

We could almost go to a LAN café with this many people. But I digress.
Where are we going to on Wednesday? I hear Jim has a Wii.

Unless you guys are really partial to the whole 'overpaying for liquor
in a public place' thing. I'm good to go with that place we always go
to. With the tables. And stuff.

Mike says:
So Larry's proposing Friday night at Jim's?

Jim says:
well, i do have a quarter bottle of the Doctor that needs finishing.

Mike says:
Is that code?

Larry says:
And remember whatever you do, don't "blows the integration work to feature branches!"

Mike says:
Sometime I just cant help myselfs.

Dabid says:
How about start at Jims, then out to a little less that 9/10th's dong-factor?

Larry says:
No seriously. What? We here at UBC actually use real english devans. Not your bastardized Engarin with a slight topping of tentacle anime pr0n you guys use over there.


Mike says:
He’s saying less cock, more rock.

Jim says:
less cock? wtf?

Mike says:
I'm sorry. Do you require a large amount of cock?

Nancy says:
well thats it, im not going.

Mike says:
Ratio-ly speaking. Subtraction through addition.

Larry says:
Somehow we got into this conversation penises, math, and ESL. What have you done Jim?


So, Friday, Jim's. Drink. Etc.

Jim says:
I sent out an email to the above people - what did you expect?

Larry says:
Frankly, more about squirrels and randy sock puppets. Perhaps a small bit on harpsichords and its impact on sub-dermal hemotomas. And then finish it all with how the IMF drives interest rates to usurp neo-capitalist power struggles in developing nations. And maybe a brief footnote on garters.